Visiting in prison

 (No Title)

John C. Fairlamb

Humility 3

In the previous blog, we looked at the 'parable' of the sheep and the goats. Jesus said, among other things, "

I was in prison and you visited me

". We tend to forget this aspect of the story. You see it is easier to identify with those who were sick, or who were poor, or were homeless but when it comes to people in prison we tend to become uncomfortable. 

I think that for many Christian men and woman, the thought of people in prison being regarded in any positive light is practically an anathema. 

Didn't they deserve to be in prison, hadn't they committed some crime that meant that they should be there and not in society at large? 

Aren't they despicable creatures who deserve our contempt?

I would simply ask would Jesus have that attitude. 

Firstly, NOT everyone who is in prison is truly guilty of what they have been accused of. Even in our modern, scientifically advanced world, miscarriages of justice happen all the time. 

Occasionally, but very seldom, do the rich members of society, actually fall prey to the system, and serve time behind bars. They use their ill-gotten gain – to employ the services of slick lawyers – who manage to get their clients off scot free. On the other side of the coin, a poor person, who may be genuinely innocent, can find themselves in a mess, and the defence lawyer assigned to them, to plead their case may or may not believe them, but who will make a half-hearted attempt but not be too bothered if they lose the case and the person is sent down. (I realise that I am generalising and that there are probably many very dedicated defence counsels who work tirelessly to see justice done for their client even if that client cannot afford to pay the legal fees. ) However the big picture is that people are not all equal before the law – except in the constitutions – and that justice is dispensed differently depending on one's status in life. 

Secondly, many are kept in prison, who have not had their day in court, or their opportunity to 'face justice'. According to the Human Rights Charter, ap erson is to be considered innocent until proven guilty. Unfortunately for many who are imprisoned, the presumption of innocence is easily forgotten by those who read the newspapers.

SO, who are we to judge those people in prison? Jesus is calling us to show compassion. Can we look the other way, when reports come out of over-crowded prison cells, people living in inhumane conditions. 

Some would say, Prison is supposed to be hard – its supposed to send a message that “If you do the crime – you must do the time.” and all other such harsh statements. We forget that amongst those who are thrown into prison are those who are prisoners of conscience – that is, they are there because of their faith. 

In many communist countries, people are jailed because of their faith. That may not be the case, at the moment in the UK, or the USA, but the time is coming when to mention the name of Jesus will be a criminal offence punishable by imprisonment or death. Already we see signs of this in that people can lose their jobs because they offer to pray for a patient whom they are treating, or they wearing a cross on a chain around their neck. I was listening to the radio one night and the presenter was going off the deep-end because somebody dared to preach the Gospel on the tube, in his hearing. He was so offended. 

It is easy to stand in judgement over people without slightest understanding of what brought them to that place. I am not advocating that we stop putting people in prison, and that because justice is unequal it should not be exercised. On the contrary, a vast number of cases that are brought to court are dealt with justly and the perpetrators of crime dealt with appropriately. But just because someone is in prison, does not mean that we ought to despise them or view ourselves as superior. Jesus, the one who committed no crime, was unjustly accused, and found guilty in an illegal court. When he was taken to the 'legitimate' court of Pontius Pilate – Pilate admitted that he found no fault in Jesus, and yet he buckled under public pressure and granted the wish of the 'people' to have Him crucified. There was no justice in the case of Jesus trial and sentencing – but there was justice because Jesus took our place on that cross that day. 

On that same night that Jesus washed the disciples feet he said to them: “

A new commandment I give – that you LOVE one another as I have loved you. People will know that you are my disciples because of your love for one another

.” 

I look on Facebook and I see lots of big “I am a CHRISTIAN kind of banners and groups, etc. People have bumper stickers for their cars, and the one of course is the famous fish. But Jesus said, “

They shall know you are my disciples by your love

." I am not saying that we have to go to the other extreme and be all secretive about it. I am not even condemning the group, the banners, or the stickers, I'm just saying that if it is all about an external show – then perhaps we have missed the point of this command. How does that kind of love show itself in our communities? Jesus said to the sheep you saw me as a stranger, and you welcomed me in. 

I was talking to a man the other day, and he told me of a church that dealt very uncharitably with a friend of his – he said she had special needs and that someone in the Church told her not to come back because she 'stank to high heaven.' The attitude of that person stank to high heavens, and no doubt caused a stench in the nose of our Lord. The poor person came out of the church devastated.

I don't become a police officer by merely putting on the uniform – I have to actually do the work of a police officer. Not all police wear uniforms – and definitely police do not wear the uniform all the time. However, even when a police officer is off duty – they never cease to be police – and in an emergency – they are ready to pick up their role at a moment's notice. They may be out and, happen to notice or become aware a crime being committed. They may not show their true colours but will act to bring the situation under control. 

In a similar way, a Christian does not cease being a Christian when they are at work, or just at home relaxing. They may not be 'in Church' or some religious rally. They may not be doing religious stuff, but Jesus didn't say “they shall know you are my disciples by your religious activity. “ No a Christian is a Christian all the time and even when he/she 'is not on duty' he keeps an eye open for opportunities to SERVE his fellow human and show love to them, for it is by that that the world may know we are Jesus disciples.

Sadly, how often do you hear a person say words to the effect of “I won't become a Christian, Christians are hypocrites.” Instead of being drawn in by our love for one another, people are repelled by the hypocrisy that they see in the Church. 

Pride is at root of hypocrisy

. 

Humility on the other hand is the essence of reality.

I am sure that ther si a lot more that can be said on this subject, but for now - I leave it there. I hope however, that you don't. I hope that you take this word, and apply it to your life in whatever way is necessary. 

John C. Fairlamb

Wrote this ages ago. It was interesting to read what I wrote.

One thing I didn't say, but maybe should have: when Jesus said "I was in prison and you visited me" he was not asking us to evaluate the cause of his predicament, whether his being hungry/naked/homeless/or in prison and in the case of in prison it says "you visited me" not "you set me free". The point is we are being to do what we can do and nothing more. Be the person guilty or innocent visiting them helps them know that they are not alone and not forgotten.

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Pentecost 2021: Language

 I try to write a poem to coincide with the Feast of Pentecost each year, I don't always make it. Quite often I make it, but a bit late. This year I started early and so I am putting down here what I have got. 

At the first Pentecost, the disciples who were already following Jesus started speaking many languages and people from many different places heard their own languages spoken by "these simple folk from Galilee" So this year I decided to treat LANGUAGE as the theme. 

I will admit that though some bits are poetic, it is not all poetry. These are my various thoughts about language. 

To begin with, did we all speak the same across the board - one universal language with universal understanding? That would have been paradise, no? An ideal perhaps to which it's natural we should aspire to return? 

It is portrayed that way in the book of Genesis that from Adam and Eve, for many generations the people spoke the same language, and then came along a huntsman by the name of Nimrod, and he was obviously a very charismatic man with a very ambitious spirit, who wanted to build a very high tower, that would "reach the heavens" - something God would not stand for. And so God miraculously "confused their languages" resulting in the downfall of the team through the inability to communicate and with that confusion came the downfall of Nimrod's mighty tower. 

Was language then like a precious beautiful ornate vase, that all of a sudden is knocked down and falls and shatters to smithereens, tiny shards of pottery take flight across the room. Not one tiny piece of the lovely vase resembling another but each one unique. Every piece representing a language, some pieces bigger spoken by many and other pieces tiny spoken by just a few. 

I don't think the shattered vase analogy is that useful really, for a few reasons: We know that languages were not completely formed at their genesis, and that they were not all formed in one moment in time. No, like the humans that made languages, languages have evolved, and different languages have come into being over the millennia that humans have been around. We know for a fact that some languages gave birth to others - for example The Dutch community that went to live in South Africa formed a language called Afrikaans. Many of the words used by their forefathers would be understood by Afrikaners today, but there have been enough changes to the vocabulary, and even the grammar, to make it distinct. 

We also know that some languages have spread not just generationally, from parent to child, but also because of politics and power. The language of the powerful imposed upon the people with no regard for the languages of the oppressed. This is why Spanish and Portuguese became the dominant languages spoken in South America, and many of the languages that were spoken there are now extinct, and why the official language of so many countries of the world is English. 

The powerful have used language as a means of oppression and control. They have barred indigenous people from communicating in their mother tongue, and insisted they only use the "official language" They have taken babies from their parents and placed them with families who do not speak the babies' languages, depriving them of so much more than just their language. 

It doesn't only happen at the level of government, but still to this day we hear too often of people facing racist abuse because they are overheard speaking in a language that is not English (in the USA and in the UK). People making the assumption that someone not speaking English or speaking with a non English/American accent means that they are foreigners, and then using that assumption whether accurate or imagined to be xenophobic towards them. 

Language is more than the words we speak or write. 

Language is that look, that shrug, that chuckle or sigh - 

language is the tear that fall from the eye. 

Language is the silence that follows a threat, a clenched jaw, a clenched fist, an intense stare, just standing there! 

Language is a handshake, a high-five or hug - 

Language is the gesture that gives heartstrings a tug! 

Words are important - should be measured and true - 

Not too many and not too few.

I think my little poem makes the point that not all language is verbal - that is consisting of words. Much of what we say to one another whether on purpose or not, we say without words. 

The saying "Actions speak louder than words", comes to mind. I think we should be very aware of what we are communicating when we aren't talking. Is what we are communicating what we really want to communicate or is it possible that our meaning can be lost in translation? 

On the Day of Pentecost that came 50 days after Jesus rose from the grave, 10 days after He had Ascended from the Earth, we read that a group of about 120 followers of Jesus were gathered together in a room, and they heard a mighty wind within the room, and what looked like little flames appeared above each person's head and they all began speaking in different languages, just like the people building Nimrod's tower, only this time, instead of this causing confusion, it actually lead to understanding as many people from the surrounding districts heard the message in their own native language. 

We should not feel threatened by a diversity of languages and diversity within languages. Our language is a part of who we are. 

I am a lover of languages. I have learnt other languages just for fun. I definitely think that people should take a pride in their own languages but they should see the beauty in other languages too. 

Some people are gifted in the area of languages being able to speak more than one, some even quite a few. Other people, for many different reasons may struggle even to manage their own language and may need a lot of help. We need to make room for all of these. 

My final thought: It has often been joked that God is an Englishman - of course that is preposterous nonsense - the truth is that God speaks YOUR language, whatever that language might be, and God understands and knows you completely. He knows and never misunderstands like humans, even your nearest and dearest, might do. 

A New Kind of Christian" by Brian D McLaren

 I have been reading this book and am almost finished reading it, but thought I would share a brief review. 

When I started reading it some time ago, I didn't realise that it is a theology book in the form of a novel. I know that sounds weird - how could I not realise it was a novel?  The author wrote in the first person, as one of the characters in his story, but I thought the author was relating something personal to himself. The character, "Dan" was a church pastor at the end of his tether and ready to pack in the pastoring and exploring his options going forward. I am not going to give you any spoilers as to what happens, but suffice to say, it was a fascinating story and more importantly chock full of very challenging thoughts about how we think about God, the Bible and Christianity. 

I at one stage unfortunately mislaid the book before I finished it, and was very worried that I had lost it. However much to my relief I found it again and started reading again. 

I am considering reading the book again with the aid of the reader's guide at the back of the book - questions and notes written by Timothy Keel. 

The book doesn't contain the full story like any good novel it finishes with a cliff-hanger. There are two other books which having read this one, I am keen to read. 

The book is published by SPCK Publishing, London, England. First published in Great Britain in 2013. 

ISBN 978-0-281-06990-3

Also available as an eBook with ISBN 978-0-281-06994-1

A reflection on Pride

Pride comes before a fall, as the Bible says. Pride is regarded by many as the worst of sins and one that gives rise to other sins. There are quite a few synonyms for pride — vanity, conceit, hubris, boasting (more of an action associated with pride), come to mind. 

However, we might be, as my parents did to me, urged to "take pride in our work" or "ourselves" which seems a strange thing to say, if pride was such an awfully wrong thing, why would someone be "proud of something" and admit to it, if pride was supposed to be a terrible sin. "I am proud of you, son/daughter, because…"

The word Pride and also Proud are in common use today in very many different contexts, but probably most famously, the annual parades and events held in cities all over the world for by the LGBTQ communities to celebrate their identities and rights and to make their communities VISIBLE where before (and sadly many parts of the world, still) are suppressed. "Gay Pride marches" as they were once known, were very much a political demonstration against the establishment that had laws that made being anything other than heterosexual very very difficult, if not completely illegal. The problem was, that in the view of the governments, homosexuality was an aberration and regarded as deviant and perverted and in fact dangerous for society. Even after some countries started to decriminalise "sodomy" or "buggery" as they termed it, they still had severe restrictions on what homosexual people could do. In the UK, there was the the infamous "Section 28" that forbade the teaching that homosexuality was in any way comparable to heterosexuality, and homosexual teachers were prohibited from sharing that truth with their students. This would apply to both gay and lesbian teachers. In fact most LGBT teachers would have had to "act straight" to all but their lovers, as if it became known that a teacher is gay, they could, and still can in some countries be sacked for that fact alone. Those restrictions of which I have only mentioned a few, gave rise to the community deciding that they had had enough of running away and hiding, and that it was what gave rise to the Stonewall riots in New York and Gay Pride protest marches. Here is the irony, that a movement comprised largely by people who are deemed "sinners" by the establishment chose to label their protests with a name of a sin, not only is it sin, but, as I said above, but the worst of sins. Some might say that that proves the point - Pride is so conceited and full of itself - it even shouts its name through the streets. Surely, with this event so clearly labelled any Christian, even if they perceive themselves to be gay, should give this event a very wide berth. As communities in different countries have made significant progress in terms of rights for their LGBTQ citizens, pride events have become less about protest, and more about celebration.  I do not perceive that the event name Pride, is boasting or sinful for that matter. 

There has in the last year emerged about the way in which Pride features loudly in society. In the realm of politics in the United States, there has grown a movement of "National Pride" - and a group calling themselves "Proud boys" they are not children, who have taken patriotism to such an extreme that it is hostile to anyone, even other citizens who they deem to be inferior. "White Pride" is a neo-Nazi movement. This movement is very different to LGBTQ pride events. 

There is a sense in which Pride is perfectly acceptable and I hope this blog will help to unpack that a bit. So I want to look at pride from many different perspectives. Try and get to get a fuller picture.

In 1980, Mac Davis released his song, "Oh Lord it's hard to be humble". 

The lyrics are:

Chorus:

Oh Lord, it's hard to be humble

When you're perfect in every way

I can't wait to look in the mirror

Cause I get better lookin' each day

To know me is to love me

I must be a hell of a man

Oh Lord, it's hard to be humble

But I'm doin' the best that I can!

I used to have a girlfriend

But I guess she just couldn't compete

With all of these love-starved women

Who keep clamoring at my feet

Well I could probably find me another

But I guess they're all in awe of me

Who cares? I never get lonesome

Cause I treasure my own company.

Ohhhhhh...

(chorus)

I guess you could say I'm a loner

A cowboy outlaw, tough and proud

Well, I could have lotsa friends if I wanted,

But then I wouldn't stand out from the crowd

Some folks say that I'm "egotistical",

Hell, I don't even know what that means!

I guess it has something to do with the way

That I fill out my skin-tight blue jeans

Ohhhhhh...

come on, where's all the kickers in here?!

(chorus)

Mac of course was being humourous and I am sure did not really think he was perfect. Sadly, there are people in our world who do think that they are perfect. The lyrics do give us a really good idea of what this kind of pride does. It puffs up. 

It makes the person feel that they are superior to everyone else.

 "With all these love starved women clamouring at my feet" 

They believe that they're totally self sufficient.

"Who cares? I never get lonesome cause I treasure my own company". 

In truth, people who are full of themselves, are very difficult people to be around, because ironically, they are in desperate need of constant affirmation, and cannot abide any whiff of disagreement or disapproval of anything that they do. When they are confronted with disagreement, they tend to lash out and be very nasty. Regardless of who that person is, they could be lifelong friends, they can become persona-non-grata in an instant. I am not a psychiatrist, but I understand that sadly, these people have a mental illness. These extreme cases are of course relatively rare. 

But I think we are all susceptible to the temptation to pride to a more limited effect, maybe in a specific content of our lives, and if we look at some of the behaviours that characterise the extremes we might see them at play in some part of our lie. What are these behaviours?

1. Boasting/Bragging. My friend posted the following comment on a photo of himself on Facebook: "Dark and lovely 😂😂😂, if you know,  you know.  This berry is darker and has some excellent years of maturing 🤣. This year embrace yourself and do some modest and humorous bragging 😊" - I was amused by the notion of "modest bragging" because of course, you would not be bragging if you were modest.  Bragging is the act of telling others about (what you perceive to be) your great achievements or qualities. Being modest is to try and divert attention away from yourself and not tell people anything positive about yourself.  Like Mac, my friend was being humorous.  He gave me permission to share that quote. But when the bragging is not being humorous, but done in all seriousness, it is not attractive at all. While I agree that people can be too humble too, but someone who continuously brags about how good they are, or how great their children are (I think that bragging about one's children is a more common form of this unfortunate trait) can be a real drain on conversation.  It is actually better to let others speak highly of you or your achievements and personal qualities. 

2. Intolerance of disagreement or different opinions. In social media, lots of different opinions and ideas are expressed, covering many different aspects of our lives. Particularly, but not only, in the area of politics, there are very polarised and strong opinions. Quite often, they will react very harshly, if someone disagrees with them or fact-checks some assertion. It can become violent and dangerous, where people threaten people with violence and people get death threats. It's worth asking ourselves, how do we cope with disagreement? 

3. A sense of superiority. This may not be purely on an individual basis. The root of racism is the notion that one is superior because they belong to a certain race. It was this sort of pride that resulted in the deaths of millions at the hands of Germany's Nazi party, killing six million Jewish people, and many others - Gypsies as well. This notion of superiority has been the cause of many other genocides in our history. If it is not race, it may be religion. Genocide is the intentional action to destroy a people—usually defined as an ethnic, national, racial, or religious group—in whole or in part. (Wikipedia article on Genocides). As a Christian, I will say that this notion of being religiously superior is a common factor in many religions, if not all of them. Most people believe that their grasp of religious truth is the right one, and by that reasoning conclude that others who do not share their beliefs are wrong. Even people who are professed atheists, can be extremely dogmatic in their atheism, and extremely condescending to people of faith. Even within religions, this superiority can rip communities to bits. As many people have noted, many wars are started on a religious pretext. In Northern Ireland, for example, it was a struggle between the Catholics and the Protestants. But even on an individual level, I think that whatever your view on religion is, you should be open enough to accept that others differing views and beliefs are just as valid as your own. We should be able to respect another person's faith even if we don't share it, and it is better to speak of your own beliefs without pointedly denouncing the beliefs of others (in the realm of religion. A big facet of religion is the concept of morality, with all religions having some moral code, and classification of good behaviour and bad behaviour, with rewards and punishments attached. I think most religions have some ultimate reward for the "faithful" and an ultimate fate or destination for those who are deemed to be "evil". Most moral codes can overlap and are quite similar in the behaviour that is characterized as good or bad. I am not aware of any religion that commends theft as a virtue. I think that most religions have a high and positive view of love. But those who have a religious superiority, may tend to characterise people who don't belong to their group in a very negative way. They will say things like "the only good ------- is a dead ------". Also,they will not allow people of different faiths and beliefs to explain their beliefs to them, but will, often arrogantly believe that they know more about that religion than even the highest proponents of that religion.  No matter what you might say to correct the person, they will say that they know better, or that you are either lying or have been lied to. In the early days of Christianity, Christians were accused of being cannibals because they "are the flesh and drank the blood of Christ" - it was a very mistaken belief based on a misunderstanding of the Christian practice of Communion, partaking of the body and blood of Christ in the form of bread and wine. Sadly misconceptions of religious groups allows for many other such nasty and malicious mischaracterisations. If you are going to condemn something of a different religion or viewpoint, at the very least, first read about it from a person who is a proponent, and ensure it is actually what you think it is. I know, that many good and sincere Christians have attacked the Theory of Evolution and "Darwinism" without actually knowing what the Theory of Evolution actually is and never having read anything about except, maybe, what may have been written by the critics of the Theory of Evolution. They are arguing against something they know nothing about. That just makes them look silly. It's like someone who has never played football and knows nothing about the rules, criticising a referee for a decision the referee made. Football referees have to be qualified if they are match officials of professional games. 

S T O P  P R E S S

6 January 2021  - Washington DC. Pro-Trump Demonstrators turn rioters and storm the US Capitol, where the joint session of Senate and House of Representatives were doing the last Constitutionally required step to Confirm the election of Joseph R Biden as the Next President and Kamala Harris as the next Vice President. The session had to be suspended and the Senators and members of Congress evacuated to places of safety. 

These are the words of Mitt Romney (UT-R) in response to this: Now we gather due to a selfish man's injured pride and outraged supporters who he has deliberately misinformed for the past two months and stirred to action this very morning. What happened here was an insurrection incited by the President of the United States. Those who choose to support his dangerous gambit by objecting to the results of a legitimate, democratic election will forever be seen as being complicit in an unprecedented attack against our democracy.

I was going to try and avoid direct references to current personalities, but these events were such a clear illustration of the consequences of Pride as described above that I had to include this quote from Senator Romney. 

I think the events and what lead up to them with the President's speech earlier where he directly told them to march on the Capitol, show one other manifestation of Pride - the inability to accept that you are wrong, or that you have been defeated. 

So much for the negative kind of pride. But unlike Theft, adultery, lust and murder, pride carries with it a connotation that is not negative, but actually quite the opposite.. 

As I was walking through the supermarket, I saw the beer called "London Pride" and then I saw this: 

I liked it so much, I brought it: 

The word Pride exists in society in many different contexts where it is seen as a good thing. The word Pride exists in many songs. And I came across a magazine called Pride Magazine,t hat literally takes pride in the local area. Here is "Lincolnshire Pride Magazin

But for those who are of the mindset that Pride is only ever a bad thing, there are a few verses from Scripture that suggest otherwise. 

This is what the Lord says:

“Let not the wise boast of their wisdom

    or the strong boast of their strength

    or the rich boast of their riches,but let the one who boasts boast about this:

    that they have the understanding to know me,

that I am the Lord, who exercises kindness,

    justice and righteousness on earth,

    for in these I delight,”

declares the Lord.

 Jeremiah 9:23-24

26 Brothers and sisters, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. 27 But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. 28 God chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things—and the things that are not—to nullify the things that are, 29 so that no one may boast before him. 30 It is because of him that you are in Christ Jesus, who has become for us wisdom from God—that is, our righteousness, holiness and redemption. 31 Therefore, as it is written: “Let the one who boasts boast in the Lord.”[d]

1 Cor 1:26-31

8 Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. 9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest seeon me. 10 That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

 2 Corinthians 12:8-10

We ought always to thank God for you, brothers and sisters,[a] and rightly so, because your faith is growing more and more, and the love all of you have for one another is increasing. 4 Therefore, among God’s churches we boast about your perseverance and faith in all the persecutions and trials you are enduring.

5 All this is evidence that God’s judgment is right, and as a result you will be counted worthy of the kingdom of God, for which you are suffering.

2 Thessalonians 1:3-5

15 That is why I am so eager to preach the gospel also to you who are in Rome.

16 For I am not ashamed of the gospel, because it is the power of God that brings salvation to everyone who believes: first to the Jew, then to the Gentile. 17 For in the gospel the righteousness of God is revealed—a righteousness that is by faith from first to last, just as it is written: “The righteous will live by faith.”

Romans 1:15-17

These verses refer to boasting and not being ashamed. It suggests that the boasting is okay, even desirable, if you are "boasting about the Lord" and what God has done. 

The opposite of being ashamed, might be regarded as being proud. I would say that if you are not ashamed you will have no problem talking about that thing you are not ashamed of. We live in a society and culture that does try and pile on shame and self-loathing on individuals for many things, where it is completely underserved. I know, as a gay man, from a very young age I was made to feel ashamed of my sexual orientation and those "less manly" aspects of my personality. Will Young calls it "gay shame" in his book "To be a Gay Man" . The kind of pride that says "I am not ashamed" is in my view a good kind of pride. I wish there were two different words to describe these different kinds of pride, someone might say that Boasting in the Lord and Not being ashamed are not the same as pride. That is a fair statement but only if you disregard every instance where pride is used in a positive sense. 

I have noticed that there are quite a number of references to "good boasting" or as it is translated "pride in some English versions, in the book of 2 Corinthians. I am quoting from The New International Version. Bear in mind that the Greek of the word "pride" or "proud" is the same as the word for boasting. 

We are not trying to commend ourselves to you again, but are giving you an opportunity to take pride in us, so that you can answer those who take pride in what is seen rather than in what is in the heart. 2 Cor 5:12

I have spoken to you with great frankness; I take great pride in you. I am greatly encouraged; in all our troubles my joy knows no bounds. 2 Cor 7:4

New International Version (NIV)

I had boasted to him about you, and you have not embarrassed me. But just as everything we said to you was true, so our boasting about you to Titus has proved to be true as well.

LPNew Living Translation

I had told him how proud I was of you—and you didn’t disappoint me. I have always told you the truth, and now my boasting to Titus has also proved true! 2 Cor 7:14 - (NLT for translation as NIV doesn't use "pride" in this context). 

NIV: For I know your eagerness to help, and I have been boasting about it to the Macedonians, telling them that since last year you in Achaia were ready to give; and your enthusiasm has stirred most of them to action. 

Contemporary English Version

I know how eager you are to give. And I have proudly told the Lord's followers in Macedonia that you people in Achaia have been ready for a whole year. Now your desire to give has made them want to give. 2 Cor 9:2

7 You are judging by appearances. a If anyone is confident that they belong to Christ, they should consider again that we belong to Christ just as much as they do. 8 So even if I boast somewhat freely about the authority the Lord gave us for building you up rather than tearing you down, I will not be ashamed of it. 9 I do not want to seem to be trying to frighten you with my letters. 10 For some say, “His letters are weighty and forceful, but in person he is unimpressive and his speaking amounts to nothing.”

 11 Such people should realize that what we are in our letters when we are absent, we will be in our actions when we are present.

12 We do not dare to classify or compare ourselves with some who commend themselves. When they measure themselves by themselves and compare themselves with themselves, they are not wise. 13 We, however, will not boast beyond proper limits, but will confine our boasting to the sphere of service God himself has assigned to us, a sphere that also includes you. 14We are not going too far in our boasting, as would be the case if we had not come to you, for we did get as far as you with the gospel of Christ. 15Neither do we go beyond our limits by boasting of work done by others. Our hope is that, as your faith continues to grow, our sphere of activity among you will greatly expand, 16so that we can preach the gospel in the regions beyond you. For we do not want to boast about work already done in someone else’s territory. 17But, “Let the one who boasts boast in the Lord.” 18 For it is not the one who commends himself who is approved, but the one whom the Lord commends. 2 Cor 10:7-18 

Sorry about the lengthy quote here, but I think it is really useful to see Paul is addressing two types of boasting Verse 8 talks about the authority Paul speaks with in matters of faith, and he states "I will not be ashamed of it" In verse 12, Paul is being very sarcastic "We dare not classify or compare ourselves with some who commend themselves"  He is saying that they measure themselves by themselves. It is like they all stroke each others egos and tell each other what wonderful people they are. In today's language, they listen to their own echo-chamber.  Verse 18 sums it up nicely - It is not ones who commend themselves that are approved but the one the Lord commends. 

There is a vast difference between on the one hand, owning who you are as a person, accepting who you and being confident in that identity, and most crucially, not feeling ashamed of something that in and of itself is not shameful, and on the other hand, being "full of oneself" , puffed up with a very much exaggerated sense of your own importance, with the arrogance that looks down on other people and demanding respect from others that you do not deserve. We should not have to demand respect, and if you do demand it, you won't get it - you may get people pretending to respect you, maybe out of fear of what you might do, but  deep down people will simply despise you. Respect really does need to be earned. 

Respect is usually earned by respecting others and appreciating other people. Caring about the wellbeing of people in your circle. Taking time to engage with and taking an interest in them generally. It is trying, at least to remember key things about people, like at a very minimum, their names. (I know that is harder for some than others, but the effort is usually appreciated). 

I think that we can be proud of achievements, without being arrogant. I can be proud if, for example, I run a marathon and complete it. If, hypothetically, I won the race, that would be a great achievement, and I would be justified in feeling proud - that's good pride - I could take my lap of honour and enjoy the cheering crowd's adulation. 

However, if I then proceeded to mock the other runners and call them "Losers" I have moved from good pride to bad pride. Good pride does not put others down. 

So, thank you if you have read this long essay. It has been written over a number of days, and has been a very interesting thought journey. I hope it is uplifting and encouraging. Do feel free to comment and let me know your thoughts on the topic of "Pride".